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Prosecutors accuse Inyoung You of turning boyfriend into her “slave,” leading him to suicide

Photo from Suffolk County District Attorney

(Editor’s note: This story contains language about suicide which some readers may find upsetting. Anyone considering suicide is urged to call 1-800-273-8255 (TALK), the National Suicide Prevention Hotline, for a referral. (More than 150 languages are offered) or call 1-877-990-8585, Asian LifeNet Hotline (24 hours). (Cantonese, Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, Fujianese are offered)

A former Boston College student drove her boyfriend into suicide by threatening to take her own life in an attempt to control him, prosecutors alleged during her arraignment Friday, ABC News reported.

Inyoung You pleaded not guilty to involuntary manslaughter in the death of her boyfriend, Alexander Urtula. She is free on $5,000 bail after being ordered to surrender her passport.

Prosecutors reveal text messages which they say lead Urtula to jump off the roof of a parking garage the morning of his graduation. They say it all started when You found out Urtula had been untruthful about ending contact with her ex-girlfriend.

You then threatened to kill herself. According to Boston Magazine, Urtula told You “You own all of me…your happiness is my only priority.” She allegedly told him if he didn’t do what she asked, she would harm herself.

“Inyoung, please, I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll leave this f*cking earth. I’ll go die,” Urtula allegedly wrote. “You own me. Please just don’t go fucking hurt yourself anymore.”


“Do everyone a favor and go f*cking kill yourself, you’re such a f*cking stupid ass worthless sh*t. dude just f*cking do everybody a favor and go f*cking kill yourself honestly,” she’s accused of writing in April.

You’s attorney said both You and Urtula were in need of help.

“When the facts come out, it will be clear that these two young individuals were very needy emotionally and were involved in a relationship that become a toxic blend of fear, anger, need and love,” Stephen Kim said to ABC News. “They simultaneously navigated pressures that everyday post-adolescents encounter.”

The family of Urtula issued a statement saying how much they missed their son.

“Not a minute of any day goes by without those who loved Alex grieving and continually feeling the sharp pain of his passing all over again,” the spokesman for the family, David Guarino, said in a statement.

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