As the father of a daughter in college, I see her growing up as an assertive, confident Asian American women with her whole life ahead of her.
I see her making a difference in the world, realizing her potential as an independent leader having a positive impact on society.
I don’t want anything to hold her back, and if anything gets in her way, I want to help break down those barriers.
It’s something most fathers would want to do for their daughters.
An article in Everyday Feminism by Rachel Kuo lists the five ways Asian woman fetishes put Asian women in serious danger.
It’s a reminder of the sexist barriers facing Asian American women today.
I won’t repeat the five reasons here. You can read her article for that.
However, I do want to say something as a father.
My daughter is a wonderful human being with endless potential and a whole world to conquer.
She’s a warmhearted young woman full of joy, warmth and vigor.
Stereotypes that demean her as a sexual object at the service of her male masters, often times White males, are mean spirited and counter productive.
I sometimes read comments on social media from women who say they’ve been able to turn these stereotypes to their advantage.
I’ve read comments from Asian American men who resent the social privilege granted to Asian women on dating sites and in society in general.
The trouble with these stereotypes of Asian American women is they take a grain of truth and twist that truth in a way that takes a person’s individuality away and turns them into some sort of perverted fantasy.
It serves to divide Asian American men and women in a way that only benefits those who would rather see the Asian American community as weak and subservient.
Turning someone into a fetish benefits no one and it certainly doesn’t benefit the people the women being stereotyped.
Read Kuo’s article in Everyday Feminism and let us know what you think.
RE: Asian American women fetishes put them in danger: Thanks wonderful article. Being a woman of color I know the pressure you daughter feels and felt. Sad that some still see us as objects and not humans.
RE: Asian fetishes put Asian American women in danger: I agree with this article for the most part. But I will say this, being an Asian man, the three most blatantly racist things said to my face in my entire adult life in the US have been from two Asian women and a white man married to an Asian women. On top of that, every few months or so an article or blogpost comes out online, written by Asian women, of why they only date white men, and accusing Asian men of being this and that, despite the fact that these men have been born and raised in the same American society that they have (same society as white men have actually). For the dozens of articles by Asian women trashing Asian men, I’ve literally only seen ONE that spoke up for Asian men…draw what conclusions you want.
Go on Okcupid.com and I guarantee you more than a few Asian women have headlines on their profile that says: “no Asian men please.” We’re already divided and it seems to be working just fine for Asian women. So long as half (statistically) of Asian women in the US do not see the need to extend any empathy and solidarity with Asian men, the division will always be there. I for one am not holding my breath for Asian women to work themselves out of their issues with self-hatred.